Cleaning and Coming Home

Guess who came home today?!?!?!?! This girl!

 So, Ainsley's birthday party was supposed to be on Friday, but she was in the hospital. The families of the friends she had invited got together and decided to give her a group gift: A clean house! The Ranch Creek Ward Relief Society had sanitized the place (it looks AMAZING) from top to bottom, and then today a carpet cleaning crew came and cleaned the carpets and the tile floors! Another tender gift from amazing friends was to have our van cleaned and detailed. The house and vehicle have never looked so good! GRATITUDE!

Today, Ainsley had not reacted poorly to the chemo, she didn't have a fever, and her doctor let her come home!!! We are so happy to have her back in our home and to have our family together. She looked at me this morning and said "Daddy, I don't want sisters to know I'm coming home today." I asked why and she replied "because I want to surprise them!" Surprise she did. Jenny and I went to pick up the older girls while Ainsley and Hudson stayed at home with Grammy. When we picked up the girls they were immediately asking when they get to see Ainsley and if she gets to come home today. We said Grammy was with her and we had to run home to get some things. When they walked in the door and saw her, the party was ON!!! (Like Donkey Kong for all you Duck Dynasty lovers...go Uncle Si!) The Smedleys are big fans of that show!

Ainsley was ecstatic to see her new bed when she arrived home.  For the longest time she finds a way each night to end up on the floor in our room at some point during the night. We try to lay a blanket down or something, but she won't have it. We decided that we needed to have a formal bed in our room for her while she is going through the chemo and to prevent her from laying on the floor when she inevitably joins us at some point in the night. This was what she came home to! Also, her assembled, beautiful, birthday bike that Daddy didn't get to put together before the hospitalization. Thank you Trevor and Mandy! 

A special shout out to someone that loves us in Utah and had these paper goods anonymously delivered to our doorstep. Seriously...you all think of everything!!!

Last but not least, today we also figured out how to get Ainsley to swallow some of the medicine she needs to take in pill form instead of the nasty liquids! A major feat for my big girl!  Similar, I'm sure, to the feat of her Daddy finally figuring out how to put paragraphs in his blog posts and have them actually stay that way after it is published.

Well, if anyone has lost faith in humanity, please call and let us tell you about the absolutely AMAZING people that we have been blessed to be surrounded by. The kindness extended toward us has left me speechless. Our house has been sanitized (Shout out to Ranch Creek Ward Relief Society), carpets and tiles cleaned, a toddler bed purchased and assembled so Ainsley can be close to us, her birthday bike from last week assembled (Trevor and Mandy :-) ), food and more food (all of it delicious) delivered at just the right time, perfectly selected gifts for Ainsley and her sisters, kind words, hugs, phone calls, friends inviting the older girls over to play, bringing the girls to and from the hospital to maximize the time we spend as a family, did I mention food dropped off at just the right time? (both at home and at the hospital). The list truly keeps going and I'm sure I've left out too many things. The good people in the world FAR outweigh the bad, despite what you see in the headlines. We really have no way to even begin to express our gratitude...

Sunday was a day of prayer, fasting, and well-wishes for Ainsley. We thank everyone the world over that has sent love and faith this way. We certainly felt uplifted and strengthened. Grammy (Jenny's mom) is here! Yeah! Jenny, Hudson, and I got to spend a few hours here with Ainsley. It was nice to see her personality start to shine through again. We've discussed a lot about her fighting spirit, but she is also one of the sweetest and funniest little girls you will ever meet. What barely-4-year-old understands and correctly applies sarcasm every now and again? I asked her if she knew she was going to get better? Her response: "I'm not sick, Dad, you're sick. Someone take his blood pressure!!!" Yep, speechless. Perhaps I need to get my blood pressure checked? Jenny and I laughed and laughed. Hudson got us all smiling with his happy face: Grammy and the girls came and joined us and the dart games continued (thank you Kile family), as did the sticky-slap-hand toys that the Moore family sent from Arizona.
 I also discovered that my phone had been hiding voice mails from me. Probably the reception in the hospital, but all at once I was flooded with messages from the first few days of hospitalization that I didn't know I had missed. Sorry if I didn't respond to your message, not intentional!

This blanket is a weighted blanket that was given to us by a friend the morning of surgery. You would not believe the comfort it was to Ainsley!!! The nursing staff both before and after surgery were amazed at how it helped her stay calm. This is a link to the mission that makes the blankets, it is run by a friend we have made since we arrived in Oklahoma! Check it out, you'll love it! http://www.myweightedblanket.com/

Raining Cats and Dogs and Tears

Well, when it rains it pours. Anyone that knows our family knows how much we love animals. In fact we are very good at training amazing dogs and then finding them a new home, right before they reach the perfect animal stage! Many have joked that they want the next dog we "re-home"! Almost every Saturday (for the past 3 years), the girls have loved to go to Petsmart where they have the pet adoption. Keep in mind, we are never looking for a dog, just going to let the girls pet the dogs. Last Saturday, we saw a dog that both Bryan and I actually really liked. We have said that we would want a dog for Hudson some day. Although we liked the dog, we walked away. But we both thought maybe instead of looking for a pure-bred dog, we should rescue one. Two families that we are close to have rescued dogs over the past year, and they are the best dogs!

 On Sunday night I was browsing craigslist, (something that is very relaxing to me) and I saw a dog that said it was a golden retriever mix. She seemed perfect and I felt a VERY strong pull towards her. On Monday, I got ahold of the rescue and scheduled a time to come see the dog. After Ainsley's doctors appointment and lab draw, I picked up the girls and we went to go see her. We all fell in love instantly! Fast forward to the next morning... I couldn't believe that we had just gotten a dog and now we are facing the crazy, stressful journey of cancer. I was thinking, "ok, no big deal. I will just call and take the dog back." Right as I was about to tell my plan to Bryan, RhyBabe grabbed ahold of Mavis in a big hug and said, "I am so glad we have Mavis, she makes me feel so calm." Well, how could we take the dog back after that? So evidently the dog is staying. Mavis really has been a great dog. She was originally found snuggling goats on a farm in Oklahoma City before being sent to the rescue in Bartlesville. She was very thin and weary and they diligently worked to fatten her up a bit. She is in good health now. It's funny, because she still eats like it could be her last meal. I will be happy when she knows that she is loved, and safe, and home. I don't see her going anywhere! She has been very healing for me too! I love that about animals. They bring such comfort. In fact they use therapeutic dogs in the children's hospital multiple days each week! Mavis, our new at-home canine therapy friend!

So, you are now wondering what the title is referring to? Getting Mavis would be considered a happy thing right? Well, this morning, I received a phone call from Bryan. He said that our neighbor and friend, Trevor, had found the body of our beautiful kitty, Saraphina, in the road. She had been hit by a car. Last night, I had a feeling something was wrong when I didn't see 'Mew Mew' in the garage. It has been over four years since Bryan called me, while rotating in Oklahoma, and said that he'd had a strong feeling we should get a cat for Rhyan to help her in moving from Arizona to wherever we would start residency. At that time we didn't even know it would be Oklahoma. Saraphina has been amazing for my girls, especially Rhyan. She could "Love" that kitty to death and Saraphina would put up with it. They had a very special bond. When I heard the news I felt like I had been punched in the stomach. How could this have happened? Why would this have been aloud to happen now? Aren't we going through enough already? How do we now tell the girls, who are reeling from having their lives turned up-side-down by Ainsley's cancer diagnosis, that their dear pet is gone? We knew we couldn't try the whole "maybe kitty found a new home" or "maybe the kitty wandered away" routine, because these girls are resourceful and would have turned the whole town and possibly state upside-down to find her. They would be knocking on the doors of every neighbor on every street. Signs of a missing kitty would be plastered on every mailbox and telephone pole around. They would not have given up until she was safe at home.

 So we just went for the straight-forward, honest approach. Bryan told them that sometimes life seems really tough, but that we can grow from our trials. We've had some difficult news this week, and there is some more difficult news, that Saraphina was hit by a car and killed. We were all a mess again. That poor hospital room has seen many tears from this family.



Regarding pets in general, we asked the doctors what we should do with the zoo we have at home: hermit crabs, dogs, and a cat (obviously the discussion took place before the cat accident). They indicated that the potential risks of infection from the hermit crabs (assuming similar bacteria to pet reptiles) was too much and that we ought to find them another home. The cat was fine if it lived outside, as long as she didn't handle it and stayed far from the litter box. The dogs, as long as they were healthy, well behaved, and up to date on vaccines and such, were encouraged to remain as a therapeutic entity for the family much like the therapy dogs at the hospital. Maybe Saraphina's job was fulfilled in helping the girls adjust to the move from Arizona to Oklahoma, and now maybe Mavis was sent to help comfort our family through this next chapter of our big adventure? It feels right so far and I am grateful for the small promptings I have had leading up to this challenge. I am amazed how much life experiences have prepared me to face what we are facing today and will be facing over the next few years.

P.S. One day we will get a new kitty, but it won't be anytime soon. We'll wait till Ainsley is well and able to play with it. Thanks for all the kind thoughts and offers to replace Saraphina, but for now we'll stick with the zoo we have ;-)

Speed Round 3/1-3/2/2013

I have been trying to remember things to record for Ainsley and our family to look back on in the future. Also, I hope the information can be helpful for others that may be facing similar challenges. But in reality, there's just no way to record it all. There is also no way to express our gratitude for the kindness, prayers, and well-wishes extended to our family. Mandy, Sara, and Amerest: thank you for thinking of all the things we would need before we even knew what they were and for arranging the army of help that we have been so spoiled to have on Team Ainsley.  To try to catch up, yesterday went pretty well. Ainsley did not want to have her dressing site changed but she was tough and handled it well. She does not want to eat much. The Kile family brought her some Nerf dart guns to play with and she and her sisters have had hours of fun. It's amazing how she lights up when her sisters arrive to visit. Part of her Chemotherapy is a heavy dose of steroids, which leads to some very strong emotions. Spicy just got spicier, sweeter just got sweeter, and we are waiting for not hungry to turn in to hungrier. Ainsley has definitely learned how to drive an IV pole. NASCAR and Danica Patrick beware, this girl can drive the IV pole, which I am certain will translate into mad driving skills in the future. She has learned how to change her own urine measuring basin in the toilet, because she doesn't want us to do it for her. She is starting to see life through a face mask as she is now officially Neutropenic (not enough white blood cells to fight infection). This also means that any visitors will need to be sniffle, fever, cough-free for at least 48 hours. 75% of the battle is hand washing, so wash and sanitize those hands!

Curly brown hair and brown eyes have been Ainsley since she was born. One of the first things you notice about her is her hair. She looks at her baby pictures, before it grew long, and asks "why was I a boy when I was a baby?" This has gone on for over a year. We have a girl doll that has no hair and she tells us it looks weird. We have started trying to find pictures of women without hair and talk about how beautiful they are. She is definitely going to need to adjust to losing her hair and we'll have to find lots of ways to help her feel girly when her hair starts falling out, which should be some time over the next few weeks to months.

Surgery Day 2/28/13

Ainsley slept very well the night before surgery. There were some morning delays, so her 8:15 case didn't get started until 10:00 or so. Thankfully she slept in and didn't have to feel any hunger or thirst until right before going down stairs. The good news is it gave time for Jenny to get the girls over to Jon and Debbie's to take them to school with their twins (the wonderful Kennedie and Emilie) and still get down to the hospital before surgery. She (Ainsley, not Jenny) was unhappy to wake up. I could tell she was afraid. She wanted nothing to do with putting the gown on, taking her medicines, or anything else that would progress her toward surgery. She finally took the Versed (happy-juice as it is called) and everything changed. It is pink medicine that supposedly tastes terrible, but once it is in, life becomes very funny and relaxed. We will post some video in the future, but she became all smiles and laughs. She looked at me while snuggling Jenny and said "Daddy, you have two heads!" She stared up at Jenny and said "Mommy, your mouth looks funny." She laughed at most things and we had a hard time understanding her slurred speech. Seeing her wheel away from us was heart-wrenching. You could still see the fear in her eyes and the hesitancy to go with the operating room nurses, but thankfully she was disinhibited enough that she couldn't protest.

Three procedures were completed at the same time: 1) The "port" which is a permanent access site that is placed in the chest wall that allows them to give blood, medicine, and fluids; but also allows them to draw blood. It replaces the IV and in the chemotherapy world, becomes your "best friend." No more tourniquets and holding down for IV access. Supposedly the kids get used to coming in, lifting their shirts, and letting the port get accessed. It is designed to last the entire 2.5 to 3 years of chemotherapy. When it is needed, a simple needle poke into a large barrel that is underneath the skin allows access for anything. When it is not needed, everything is under the skin so Ainsley will be able to go swim, bathe, shower, etc. It rests underneath the skin on her left side, below the collar bone, similar to a pace maker. 2) A lumbar puncture (also known as a spinal tap). During this procedure they drew out some cerebrospinal fluid (CSF--the fluid that surrounds your brain and spinal cord) to test for cancer cells and also delivered the first dose of chemotherapy intrathecally (into the CSF). We are happy to report that there were no lymphoblasts (the cancer cells) in her CSF, which means she likely will not need any radiation therapy. 3) A bone marrow biopsy from her hip.

We were relieved when the surgeon came to tell us all went well. We were more relieved to see our little fighter showing her personality in the recovery room. She wanted a "juice box" but when it came as juice in a sippy-cup, well, that was unacceptable and she wasn't afraid to admit it. The next attempt at a juice with a straw in it was not enough either. Not until we got to the room and got her a juice box was her thirst satisfied. But the good news is, despite her opposition to the juice box, she turned on the charm with the recovery room nurses and they were smiling and laughing with her by the end, or perhaps they were high-fiving what she was not there to show them how tough she is.

Not long after returning to the room, she complained of a headache and began vomiting. This could have been from the anesthesia or from the lumbar puncture. She only had a few sips of juice box and a part of a donut after surgery, so that was quickly thrown up and she was dry heaving after that. This continued off and on for the next 2 hours. One episode left a few specks of blood in what she threw up, because she was heaving so hard. Not a fun sight to see on my little girl that has few platelets and low hemoglobin. This was also a day that Ainsley expressed some anger. She hates the feeling of tape being removed from her skin. The EMLA numbing cream they put on before putting her IV in on day one was great for the needle poke, but taking the tegederm strips off that they put over the cream to get it to be absorbed better was probably worse than the needle stick would have been. So from day one, removing tape, EKG pads, bandaids, or dressing covers has been a sad event met by a fighter's spirit. I also see Ainsley channeling that anger towards me (Daddy) because I am always the one holding her when the shots are given, tape is removed, or medicine is given. Medicine, that is a whole other story! She has to take medicine by mouth multiple times a day, and it frankly tastes terrible to her. It is all liquid form and has made her puke a few times. Mostly she just doesn't want it and puts up a tremendous battle. She got her evening dose right after Jenny had taken the rest of the family home to sleep. Ainsley said "I wish Mommy was here and not you!" I told her that she would have to take the medicine no matter who was here. She tried her best to be mad at me and, I'll admit, did a great job at deflecting my impeccably timed humorous efforts... Ultimately, the medicine was taken and we snuggled. I told her I love her and sometimes I have to make sure she does hard things in order to help her feel better. We are getting to the point that she is 70% happy with me and 30% mad that I brought her here. 

Every day so far she has been able to see her sisters. She lights up and perks up like you can't believe when they arrive. It has been hard for the older girls. We have tried to keep the discussion open with them and tried to find ways to help each of them to feel special. It is hard because Cancer is fighting the whole family. It is in Ainsley's body, but it deeply impacts each of us. Ava is 5, and for her, she seems to see it as her playmate is in the hospital and not at home to play. When she comes to the hospital she sees Ainsley, with new toys and stuffed animals and thinks "wow, she's lucky, look at what she got!" Rhyan, age 7, is a little harder to read. She is thinking deeply about things, and afraid of what it all means. She tries to use humor to ease her fears. Meili, age 9 going on motherhood, is full of turmoil as she tries to be the caretaker of her two younger sisters because that is how she thinks and functions. We frequently remind her that we are the parents and she can be a kid. But that is easier said than done; she's a very mature 9 year old. Worries of Ainsley definitely have distracted her since she heard the news. On the way to school on Wednesday morning, Meili asked me "why did this have to happen to Ainsley?" I said "That is a really good question, and I don't know the answer." We talked some more and I told her that "I do know that Heavenly Father knows exactly what each of us can handle in our lives, and Ainsley is facing something that very few can handle but Heavenly Father knows that she can." Our theme, as you have seen, is that Cancer picked the wrong girl to mess with. Ainsley Elleanor Smedley came out swinging as a baby and has not slowed down since. Sweet with a whole lot of spice. As the car got closer to school and the tears started to well up in the girl's eyes, I was grateful for this imagery. The girls laughed as they pictured Ainsley clawing at Cancer (because each of them have felt her clawing, and it hurts!) We laughed as everyone got the chance to chime in how Ainsley was going to claw, bite, spit on, and "toot in the face of" cancer. Not sure why those images are all so funny around our home, but the kids get a kick out of the topic and so do we. We pulled up to the school and repeated what we talked about on the morning of the phone call: Now is the time to be insanely courageous and take the first step out of the car. From there, smile and know that everything is going to be ok. They put on their brave faces and walked right inside. They have done the same each morning since then. My kids have INSANE COURAGE!

Platelets, Red Blood Cells and Echocardiograms on 2/27/13

Ainsley continued her battle with Leukemia by keeping those around her on their toes. She needed a baseline echocardiogram because some of the medications can be harmful to her heart. The technologist that came to do the ECHO got a taste of what Cancer is fighting against with Ainsley. As he pushed on her belly she screamed "you are hurting me!!!" and took a swing at him. She's always been good at expressing her feelings...usually at a decibel level that hovers between a rock concert and a jet engine. The platelets she was given on the first day raised her level up to 73k or so. They wanted above 40k or 50k to do surgery. Her hemoglobin was low, so she was given some packed red blood cells. The anesthesiology team and surgery team came to see her in preparation for her surgery the next morning. We were particularly impressed when the surgeon showed up in cowboy boots. My favorite thing is to operate in cowboy boots!

Bryan's Ramblings

Here are some of the thoughts that I have had so far.

Monday night (the night before the diagnosis), I was needing to study for my exams and for the next day's surgical cases.  For a quick Family Home Evening (FHE) I decided to talk about what we had spoken about in church the day before:  how adversity strengthens us.  I even used the example of my cousin and her son who has lymphoma and the blessings we heard their family receive along the way as they work through a very hard road... (Go TEAM LINX!  We are here with you buddy!)

We finished FHE and I needed to go study.  I hadn't been studying long when I found myself drawn out to the front room where I saw Ainsley and Jenny snuggling.  Ainsley had taken a long afternoon nap, and would not be sleeping any time soon.  She and Jenny were watching a movie and Ainsley asked me to snuggle her.  I did (glad I didn't pass that up for studying) and we snuggled for an hour or more.  While holding her I felt quite a few swollen lymph nodes in her neck and arm pits, and Jenny and I reviewed the many bruises on her back, arms, and legs.  It seemed like more were showing up out of no where.  We were anxious to hear the results of the labs the next day...

The next morning I was just about to go back to surgery for a 7:30 case when Jenny called me in tears.  "They think it's leukemia...and we need to take her straight to the children's hospital."  I'm grateful to a great residency program that allowed me to leave immediately.  Our pediatrician called me while I was driving home and discussed it with me.  The rain was pouring inside and out of my car.  I did not enjoy making the tear-filled call to family members and thank Mom, Dad, Shari, and Aunt Lori for helping me not have to make it over and over.  We were quickly overwhelmed (in a good way) with love and support in texts, calls, and emails.  I am grateful to Dr McDowell for telling us on the phone what he knew and getting things rolling immediately.  If he hadn't told us what he knew it would have been between 6 and 8 hours before we would have otherwise heard the news, and that was with things going smoothly once we got to the hospital.  I can't imagine how we would have felt if he had only told us that the labs were off and we needed to go to the Children's Hospital.  He gave us enough information to allow us to process and be ready for the whirl-wind that would come once we were at the hospital.  He had also prepared everything so we could go straight and get checked in, rather than go through the emergency room.  He knew the admitting pediatric oncologist's name and had all the arrangements.  Sometimes bad news is best delivered over the phone...

Once we got to the hospital, we were quickly reminded that cancer chose the wrong girl to pick on.  If you've met Ainsley, you know that she will go nose to nose with anyone if she doesn't like something.  Talk about a fighting spirit ;-)  She quickly became frustrated with being at the hospital and not at home.  She repeatedly yelled "I told you not to bring me here Daddy, and I told you not to let them give me a shot!  I just want to go home!  I wish we had never come here!"  Painful.  She carried on that way for about an hour and a half after the IV was in as she had to get used to it being taped to her arm and the brace they placed around it.  She finally collapsed, exhausted, into my arms and slept for about 2 hours.  She must have had sweet angels of loved-ones past helping her out because since then she has been able to tolerate the IV without screaming at Dad.  I started to catch a glimpse of just how sick my little girl is when the first attempt at an IV resulted in a huge hematoma in her hand because of her low platelets (which typically help stop bleeding).  Her platelets had dropped clear to 13K, which normal is between 100K and 300K.  I shuttered to think of the implications.  I had seen my patients sick like that, but never imagined it being my own daughter.

My dear friend, and fellow resident, Rusty came to visit within hours of admission.  He brought Pei Wei and a beautiful edition of the Secret Garden for us to read while we are here.  We are so grateful, neither Jenny nor I had even thought of eating to that point.  Soon after that, the pediatrician that discovered the problem, Dr. McDowell, came to visit.  Jenny went to get the girls and bring them down to visit (more on that later).  Another fellow resident, Rob, brought us dinner and chatted.  Andrea and Mark (also resident friends) stopped by and have offered countless hours of support.  Andrea is a Pediatric resident and was one of the first faces we saw in the hospital.  What a relief that was to see a familiar face.  We are at the children's hospital, which is not the hospital I usually work at, but is one that some of the other residency programs at my hospital go to.  Always nice to have familiar faces.

Since the phone call that morning, the girls knew only that we had been crying, that Ainsley was sick and needed to go to the hospital for a few days for some medicine, and that she had some bruises.  I can only imagine what was going through their teacher's minds as they related that info...  Meili had overheard the word 'Leukemia' but was not sure what that was.  Their principal, school counselor, and teachers were made aware of what was going on soon after the girls arrived to school; and that the girls only knew the above info.  They were tremendous in helping the girls through that day.  

Sara picked up the girls from school and played with them for a few hours until Jenny could get home to them and bring them back to the hospital to discuss the details and visit with Ainsley.  When we told them that Ainsley's blood was sick with a cancer called Leukemia, I watched Meili's chest and stomach react like she'd been punched.  There were lots of tears, hugs, and snuggles.  The girls asked a lot of questions and we did our best to answer them.  Rhyan (7 yrs old) asked "so is there a good chance that she will get better?"  We told her YES!  We also talked about some of the things the Team here had suggested we address with the kids:  1) Ainsley's cancer is not contageous, and 2) that no one could have caused it by being mean to or mad at Ainsley and that no one did anything wrong to make her sick.  Both of these are common questions that siblings often have.  They might worry that they caused it by being mad at or having fought with their sibling.  

Soon after that, Trevor and Andy stopped by to help me give a Priesthood blessing to Ainsley.  In Ainsley's blessing, she was reminded that "she is the glue that holds our family together," a blessing she had been given in her baby blessing almost 4 years ago.  She had also been blessed in the baby blessing to know that the Plan of Salvation (the Lord's plan for the happiness of His children)would be very real to her throughout her life, and that was echoed in this blessing.  Her children and grandchildren were mentioned, and how her experiences now will bless many generations to know the love of God for each of his children.  Jenny and I were also given blessings and were comforted.  We had a family prayer together and then I took the older girls home and Jenny and Hudson stayed with Ainsley.  Throughout the day, you would not believe what a great boy Hudson was.  We never dreamed that at two months old, he'd be joining us in the Pediatric Hospital while Ainsley got chemotherapy for Leukemia. As I write that, I'm shocked...  

On Sunday (two days before the phone call), Jenny and I had been discussing how we were finally getting things back to normal.  Getting Hudson here was a long, hard, road.  Jenny was very sick throughout the pregnancy, with severe vomiting, dehydration, kidney stones, sinusitis, and migraine headaches.  My residency was residency, always out of time, money, and sleep ;-)  We honestly have felt so overwhelmed for the past 10 or so months that we were anxiously awaiting Hudson's arrival and getting life back to normal so we could recover from the crazy year we just had.  Then the phone call 2 days later.  Little did we know that the crazy year we just had was the warm-up for the time ahead.  I guess before you run a marathon, you work your way up by running longer and longer distances to prepare yourself.  I am reminded of my favorite Chinese phrase, one that has helped me immensely throughout my life...zhen jin bu pa huo lian (Real gold doesn't fear the refiner's fire).  The first movie Jenny and I saw when we were dating was The Emporer's New Groove.  After a series of mishaps and death-defying events that seemed insurmountable, the two main characters find themselves floating along on a smooth river.  Pacha quickly sees the next obstacle...a huge waterfall.  Kusko cannot see it from where he is and only hears Pacha say "uh oh."  Kusko says "let me guess, a huge waterfall?" Yes.  "Sharp rocks at the bottom?" Most likely. "Bring it on!"  You may have to see the movie to get it, but we have laughed at that phrase and it has helped us throughout our marriage and know that these moments will also pass.  Our Father in Heaven knows what we face each day and has already shown us that He will help make our burdens feel light.  He also shows us that what we thought was a burden before was probably nothing compared to what we are capable of handling when we put our faith and trust in Him.